Why wilderness?

In some men, the need of unbroken country, primitive conditions and intimate contact with the earth is a deeply rooted cancer gnawing forever at the illusion of contentment with things as they are. For months or years this hidden longing may go unnoticed and then, without warning, flare forth in an all consuming passion that will not bear denial. Perhaps it is the passing of a flock of wild geese in the spring, perhaps the sound of running water, or the smell of thawing earth that brings the transformation. Whatever it is, the need is more than can be borne with fortitude, and for the good of their families and friends, and their own particular restless souls, they head toward the last frontiers and escape.

-Sigurd olson

I like stones.

Sometimes when sitting on the river bank I start moving stones. I might make a little pile, I might just move them around to see if I find anything interesting in them. I like to keep them every once in a while, they remind me of different things.

This moving of stones is almost like the laying of hands, exceot that in this case the process is reversed, because when i touch them i seem to exchange my little worries for some of their stability and calm.

I like stones. To me they are not dead or inert but as alive as the crystals and minerals that compose them. While they may appear unchangeable, I know that each one has a character of its own and an indelible record of some phase of the earths history.

The stones i keep-they remind me of places Ive been, places where a memory was made in one way or another. Maybe its a memory of a riverbank where i saw the water trickling down like crystal liquid over a bed of green and orange moss. Maybe it reminds me of a dry summer day when I was so tired that i could barely lift my feet up high enough when i walked, and kicked dirt and dust covered rocks all over with every step.

Maybe it reminds me of throwing rocks into the river with my son, worrying about nothing in the world but how far we could throw them or how many times i could get them to skip.

Maybe it reminds me of my father throwing rocks into the same river with his son and feeling the same thing years and years later.

I like stones.

Watching Nature in the Starbucks

Im sitting at the starbucks in santana row, and really should be studying. Thing is, I've been studying so much lately I feel studied-out!

I was thinking a while ago how i really should ditch my laptop, cell phone, I-pod, etc for a while. i thought maybe it would help me "simplify" a little bit, if you will.

So now I'm sitting here, in the Silicon Valley, in a Starbucks, and have my laptop on my lap and my I-pod in my ears. The strange thing though, is that while sitting here listening to my I-Pod i am feeling detached and comfortable. I feel kind of how i feel when I'm sitting on the porch of the Urich Cabin in Government Meadows and looking out into the woods.

I find it funny that sitting in the starbucks listening to music and watching all these people around me talk but not hearing their words is so similar. Its like two different kinds of nature, two different kinds of scenery, but earily reminiscent.

To be continued.... my macchiato is here.